fiction about Motherhood and identity
- Marley Betts
- 23 hours ago
- 3 min read
Some women dread motherhood while others feel it is their life's purpose. Some women love it... until they don't. Some women love it most days. Some women endure it. Some women share it. Some women lose it.
Everybody's experiences of motherhood are different, and whether good, bad, or somewhere in between, those experiences are valid.
No matter where you sit on the scale, as a mother, there are always going to be times when you feel like you have lost yourself. Lost that pre-mother identity. Lost the you that you were before you had children. Lost your focus. Lost your zest. Lost who you are somewhere along the way.
It may be for a moment, until you take a deep breath, pull up your socks, steady yourself, then move through it. Or, you may dwell there for days, weeks, months, or perhaps even years.
It can feel like drowning. It can feel as if you only exist to serve. It can feel overwhelming. It can feel monotonous. It can feel like every day is Groundhog Day, or like you're forever chasing your tail.
It can suck.
In those moments, when you feel as if you have lost sight of who you are, when you feel stuck, and sad. Those moments are thick and heavy. Those are the moments that you feel as if you never should have become a mother. You feel inadequate. You feel ill-equipped.
What the heck are you doing? Right?!
Can you relate to these thoughts and feelings?
I honestly think that most mums can.
Now, think about picking up a fiction book about motherhood. What do you expect to find? What would you want to read about? How do you want it to make you feel?
Here are some ideas:
Humor - Give me something funny to lighten the mood of motherhood
Drama - Let me read about people whose chaos is bigger than mine
Fantasy - Let me read about mothers whose experiences are totally different (and probably a lot stranger) than mine
History - I want to read about how mothers used to do it
Contemporary - Give me modern motherhood stories with modern themes
Romance - I want some sugar or spice for the mumma
Trauma - I want to read about broken mums
Family life - I want to read something relatable
Dystopian - Suffering mums are my thing
Post-apocalyptic - I like my mumming to be done after the apocalypse, thanks
Chic lit - Light and breezy motherhood stories for the win
Diverse - I want to read about other types of mumming
Sci fi - I want to think about futuristic mums, or mums in space
Do you want to read about mothers whom you can admire and get pointers from? Or will they make you feel crap? Do you need to read about crappy mums so you can realise that your mumming could be a lot worse? Do you want to read to escape? To cry and let it all out? To be entertained? To laugh? For fun? To learn?
Reading with purpose can help you thrive.
Hot Tip: Don't discount non-fiction.
Sometimes, picking up a book about parenting, generational trauma, managing your emotions, parenting neurodiverse children, relationships, depression, anxiety, dealing with sibling rivalry, or whatever else is a troubling issue for you, may help you more than trying to escape in fiction.
Sometimes, finding meaning in your motherhood can also help you relocate your identity.
Try to remember why you became a mother in the first place. Have a think about why you do anything that you do. If it is simply 'because you have to', then anyone is going to feel lost at sea. Live with purpose.
If you are the type of mother who is searching for a role model, then I do not have the book for you (see pictures lol).
But, if you are searching for a relatable story about another struggling mother who is overwhelmed by noise, mess, and chaos, then I can point you in the right direction!
Try my newest release, Other Than Mother—relatable family-life fiction written for overwhelmed mothers. Start there. Otherwise, head to Goodreads or Google and search for a book to help you thrive (then make time to actually read it).
I wish you well and hope you find the perfect fiction book about motherhood and identity to meet your needs.
Oh, and do answer in the comments, I'd love to know:
What is your favourite book about motherhood?
Happy reading!
Much love,
Marley
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