How to Get Rid of a Telemarketer: A Day in the Life of a Cold-Caller

Please do not be rude or unkind to a telemarketer. Don't try to give them reasons why you're not interested. Take this advice from an ex-telemarketer about how to get rid of a telemarketer, then happily go on with your day.

Work looked like this

I used to be a telemarketer who cold-called people to read them a script that tells them that they "are a recipient of a specially reserved" um, appointment with a person at a gym who is going to try to sell you a membership.

The job wasn't fun. I was hired as a contractor and ended up with a big tax bill because, at 18-years-old, I had no idea what being a contractor meant and didn't have an ABN. The company entered into contracts with gyms in Australia and New Zealand. Some people (me) sat at a table with a phone and a list of phone numbers and names and worked their way through the list, calling to offer these "specially reserved" appointments. There were other people (not me) who were sent to the gyms to greet the people, then try to sell them memberships.

Would you believe that nearly 25 years later, I still have the script I used...

On the table in front of each telemarketer was a phone and a script:

"Hello! Is this the ___ residence? Great! My name is ___. How are you this ___? The reason for my call is ___ is proud to announce that you are the recipient of a specially reserved 20 month membership. to the club.. So isn't that great!!"

In front of each table was a board with A4 pieces of paper bluetacked to it. Each piece of paper had a heading that was an objection we would commonly hear from the people we were calling. Things like; "I'm not interested", "I'm too old", "I can't afford it", "I don't have the time", etc. So, when the person we called inevitably said one of those things, we could just read the script from one of the pieces of paper in front of us. During most calls, we would work our way through several objection scripts, until they hung up... ideally.

We could often tell if we weren't getting anywhere with a person, but we were told that while they were still on the phone, we were still in with a chance, so we kept trying anyway.

Reading the script underneath objection after objection. The only way we would cross a name off the list is if they got really angry or hung up.

... and the procedure manual containing all the objection scripts

3 months into the job, I tried to quit but got promoted instead. I became a Personal Assistant, moved into a cool office with the Human Resource Manager, did the rostering, helped to screen, hire, train, and wrote a procedure manual. I learned a lot in both positions. I credit my time as a telemarketer as a huge part of making me a clear and excellent communicator who can stay calm under pressure, and someone who can stay focused and persistent despite rejection or criticism. It also taught me a lot about other people, their worries and vulnerabilities, and how speaking with a smile genuinely makes a difference.

I didn't love my job, but I love what it taught me.

Okay, so now back to the purpose of this blog:

Question: How to get rid of a telemarketer.

Please do not abuse a telemarketer. Please do not be rude or unkind.

Answer: Hang up.

If I receive a telemarketer call these days, I hang up. I don't try to engage in conversation. I don't tell them that I used to be a telemarketer myself and appreciate what they do, or try to give them reasons why I'm not interested. I just quietly hang up the phone without a word and consider it a kindness to them, because if I'm still talking, then they still think they're in with a chance. Not once have they ever called me back, thinking that they got cut off. I imagine them crossing my name off their list and moving on to the next number.

Let's end this blog with a little story. In my job as a telemarketer, we were not allowed to say the word "free". Like, ever. I remember being in the break shed out the back, eating my lunch, when someone asked me if I was doing anything over the weekend. I answered with something like, "I don't have any plans, I think I'm free." Well... one of the managers heard me say this and proceeded to yell at me so bad that I literally thought I might poo my pants. When I think back on it, I wonder what kind of trauma this guy had from a previous experience with someone using the word "free" while on the phone to respond like that. I assume that someone once tried to sue them for a telemarketer offering a "free" membership to get them through the door, then they responded by flat-out banning every use of the word on the premises.

Yeah. It was not the healthiest of workplaces. There was a persistent rumor that the guy who ran the place was legally blind and claiming disability benefits. Anyway, I wonder what these people are doing now, nearly twenty-five years later. I was fortunate that I still lived at home and didn't rely on this job, but some people did. I remember single mothers and people with families working there who needed the job and relied on the income that they made as a telemarketer. I hope that they were all able to take the experience they received from this place and were able to use it to get themselves good, reliable jobs with nice people.

All of that being said, I did work with some great people and made some wonderful friends at the time. Isn't it funny to look back at the places you've been in life? Hopefully, it makes you as grateful as I am to be in the place that you are!

Happy days!

Much love,

Marley x